Saturday, February 04, 2006


I feel it's necessary to make a statement regarding the high proportion of Indians invited as honorary members to this bullshit blog. Our statistics show that 95% of the invitees are actually Indians, the question in need of an answer then is: 1) Why so many Indians, 2) How come Indians are so good bullshitters (please observe that this is a highly desirable skill which you should all be proud to possess).

Personally I also feel that I have to answer all the questions Ive got throughout the years about the amount of Indians in my life. Ive been putting down a lot of time and research into the two questions above, and into the question of why so many Indians in my life, and I will now share the report with you. Please note that the text on this page can not be distributed, copied, or sold for any other than personal and educational purposes.

HP's official statement regarding India, Indians, and Indian bullshitters

1) Why so many Indians?
Now, I dont mean the demographic issue of 1 billion Indians, I leave that to others to investigate, but the question I will address is why has my life been so full of Indians last years? And hence the reason to having so many Indians being honorary members of this blog. Well, there are many reasons:
a) It is like cockroaches - if you kill one, they all come. Not that I have killed anyone, and not that I know if it's me or the Indian who would be the cockroach, but the moral of the story is that when meeting an Indian friend, he always introduces you to his Indian friends. And so your circle of friends increase like rings on the water, and before you know it they have taken up every spot in your telephone book! And also, when thinking about it, looking at the world's population everybody should have at least 1/6 of Indians, and 1/6 of Chinese people in their phone books.
b) Is there something suspicious hiding behind my blond hair (I know it's hard to believe that it would be something in there...)? Is it all fake? Am I not actually a Swede (no Im not, Im Finnish)? Am I an Indian?, and then obviously I would have many Indian friends....
Theories have been put forward that I was an Indian in a previous life. Now, I dont believe in incarnation (not so Indian after all, huh!), so that cant be true.
Or is like my dear cooking team mate in France Rohan said: "You've become like an Indian bitch!" (which I didnt know if to take it as a compliment... :s). Meaning there is something Indian inside of me, that now finally is being released after 25 years in the Hanna-prison. The Indian in me is finally coming out!
c) Like minded attracts like-minded. So if I have this Indian bloodcells running around in my body, it isnt so tough to see why I would get along so well with Indians. Also, I found that the Indians Ive met have been ambitious, sarcastic, funny, driven, smart and chilled out (enough sucking up!) - and so yes, like-minded attracts like-minded, and obviously I can connect to all the Indians :-)

So that were some of the possible theories to why there are so many Indians on this blog and in my life. But now-

2) Why are Indians so good bullshitters?
Firstly, it is important that I state that one of the reasons why Ive surrounded myself with Indians is their skill in bullshitting. I am happy for everything you've taught me throughout the years, and how youve supported my bullshit-education.
The HP-institute's research on this topic hasnt come very far. During my three-week trip in India I did study this carefully, and thanks to masters like Sam and Indranil I got to experience some first-class bullshitting. However time was too limited for a complete study. Due to today's technology I hope to be able to virtually continue the study, with your contribution to this page, where I can analyse your statements.
I think the answer to this question lies in the root of bullshitting, and why we are spending time doing it. For me bullshitting, is a way of living. And maybe it's the same for Indians. Or then due to the huge Indian population, there obviously has to be more Indian bullshitters in absolute figures than Swedes. And if like-minded attracts like-minded all of them have been sucked to me and Angie through the bullshit magnet that we are carrying.
Other reasons for the Indian's well developed skill in bullshitting can be the weather, the religion, the culture, the food, or simply the fact that a lot of Indian men have red hair when they've done some henna-stuff with it.
As stated, when research has progressed we will present the findings. Any donations to the study are welcome, as well as "test-rabbits" for our bullshit-interviews!

So, now when all this research has been presented, it's time to welcome some Indian bullshitting, to get some diversity to this Mexican-Swedish page.

Enjoy your day!


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